Monday, December 23, 2013

Well Played Garden Jeans, Well Played...

There is one pair of terrible old jeans that I always wear to garden.

They are old, ripped, stained, dirty and they don't fit. They haven't fit for a long time.

They should be retired, probably for pants with an elastic waistband.

Me wearing these pants is a little like 10 pounds of potatoes stuffed in a 5 pound sack. In all honesty - maybe 15 pounds. You get the idea.

For the longest time, the left knee was all ripped open from seam to seam and every time I would kneel, I would have to hike my pant leg up or my naked knee would be on the ground.

One day, while at Freddies, I had a revelation. I should buy iron-on patches and use them to fix the knee. Even I can iron.

I bought the patches about 9 months ago. I put them in "that drawer", the one with all the crap. The Bermuda Triangle of kitchen drawers. They were pretty well buried.

Finally last week, I channeled my "inner Martha" and whipped out the iron, ironing board, found the patches and prepared to "fix" my pants.

The first thing I did, was accidentally touch the bottom of the hot iron to one of the patches and got adhesive all over the hot iron. I had to clean that off first.

I proceeded to iron the patches over the holes. I was pretty happy I was repairing my jeans and they looked good, or as good as abused yard work pants can look.

I wore them for the first time again on Saturday.

My patch job! With new rip!

The first time I knelt down, they ripped a new hole just below the patches.

Well played garden jeans, well played...

UPDATE: On December 27th, my garden jeans were finally put to rest. The entire knee on both sides blew out and they went into the garbage...

Flowers and condolences are appreciated. R.I.P. garden jeans.


  1. Could be garden cut -offs for the summer ? Happy xmas Mathew !

  2. Glad to know I'm not the only one who refuses to ruin good clothes and thus looks like a ragamuffin in the garden.

  3. I know it's not fashionable...not that THAT has ever stopped me...but I'm all about sweat pants...with all the bend, pulling and stooping, it saves me from mooning the neighbors ;-)

    1. I hesitate to know what the neighbors think of my gardening outfit!

  4. Reminds me of a Donovan song: "I Love My Shirt"

    1. I had to Youtube that. I didn't really love those jeans - they were more of a uniform to keep all my other pants clean. In the summer, I wear shorts and have constantly scraped and dirty knees like a 5 year old boy.

  5. I love this post. I have the rattlesnake pair of jeans (also two sizes too small) that are ripped and being held together by the paint that's covering them. They perfectly show off my plumber's crack though. How could I get rid of them?

    1. *rattiest* not rattlesnake. Stupid autocorrect.